How many times have you heard someone say exactly those words? Or you have, for that matter, to someone else? As a pretence to what exactly?
Being a Norwegian, I must admit, to having little or close to none, of the typical behaviorisms as you would find when you meet people in Norway. In here lies an opportunity. On the one hand I could be frustrated of never finding the people to fit in with or I could find, what would essentially be, my tribe.
Just because you are born somewhere, or just because you are born into a neighbourhood or family, that doesn’t mean that they know who you are (even though they claim to know all about you, and of course they do, from their own view of the world), but who you are isn’t comprised of other peoples opinions of you.
Their tales of how they see you aren’t applicable to who you are, because your point of view, how you see the world, are slightly different. How they read you mannerisms and how they interpret how you use your words might be totally off of how you intended to communicate. Again, you have a choice.
On the one hand, you could use a lot of time and energy on convincing everyone close to you, who you really are and how they should see you, or you could go the easy way around it all, – be the one who acknowledges you. You see, there is a funny twist to it all, at least in my experience.
The more quirky I have decided to be, the more weird and different I have chosen to be, – like really owning it and not half-assing it, I would become gentler and not so off putting, towards the very people I never thought understood me. In essence, by becoming more of who I would like to be, and enjoyed being, people around me enjoyed being around me even more, as well.
I started hanging out with people I enjoyed more as well, and hung out less with people, that frankly didn’t give me much joy in the first place. I found my tribe, as a compilation of all kinds of different people, that I met over the years. Not as ready made groups already gathered for me to join. Maybe this is how you find your tribe as well?