One of the first things we are taught are to protect ourselves, i.e. protect our feelings. That somehow, someone will always be out to get us through our feelings.
Learning with senses
What I have learned in my 40 plus years, being the sensitive one as a child and low and behold I didn’t grow out of it, my feelings are one of my superpowers. How did I come to that? I realised the whole point with feelings. That we have gotten it wrong, the whole time.
Kids are so different, just as us grown ups, they start having a personality already from a month old. They start relating who they are in your little world of family and friends who often visit and they learn through their senses: they see, listen, feel with their hands, taste just about everything they can get their hands on, smell you and everything in the room.
Everything that differs from what they have learned before. They see how you react with all your senses. In the beginning it is all about, I like it or I don’t like it.
From senses to feelings
As they are crossing that first year they learn about feelings, still much based on how the close family and friends are acting towards feelings. They also learn how to use feelings as a means to an end. As though as we grown ups never do! Now we are actually getting right down into the gist of it all.
People, such as myself as a child and grown up, are often described as being sensitive and feel too much. In a way, yes, when you deny yourself from being the one who feels, it will get intense. However, and here is the whole point of me saying that people have gotten the whole point of feelings wrong.
Instead of trapping yourself in being angry, being shy, being happy and so on, what if this is a way experience the world? What if feelings are a way to understand people and situations? What if feelings are a superpower and people who don’t acknowledge it are trapped in them and therefore they start hating them. When they do acknowledge their capacities with feelings they also understand other people more.
Without feelings, you cannot understand how others are feeling, and this subtle communication which is meant to complement the words people are communicating so you understand them better, is lost to you and this is how people often are misunderstood.